Posts Tagged ‘children’

EMPATHY RULES – without RULES!

February 28, 2011

From Ruth Elliott, Creator of GoMommyGo, Director of Edu Designs

Why is it that some people seem to have more empathy than others? Some seem to have none at all.  How did we get this way? Is it nature? Is it nurture?

Neuroscientist Dr. Marco Iacoboni, author of “Mirroring People, the new Science of how we connect with others” tells how scientists have discovered the brains’ capacity for what they call ‘mirroring’: the ability to feel something that happens to another as though it’s happening to us!  What we call ‘empathy’ happens when our brains light up in the same areas in our brains that mirror what the other person is feeling. One of the earliest scientific observations found a monkey’s brain fired up seeing someone licking an ice cream cone as though he were eating it himself!

Monkey watching someone eating an Ice creamDr. Iacoboni says, “All in all, we come to understand others via imitation, and imitation shares functional mechanisms with language and empathy.”

To me  that sounds like, “MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO!”

Most of us are innately wired to feel for each other. And certainly nothing makes you sacrifice for another person faster than being a parent. When your little one suffers, you suffer. When they laugh, you’re happy. And in moments of clarity we may even see a bum on the street as a mother’s once beloved child, and suddenly we are all humanity struggling with the same breath.

It’s no wonder that most faiths embrace some sort of teaching that expresses “Treat others the way YOU want to be treated”.

But how can we teach that to children?

According to Dr. Iacoboni, “…whenever you expose kids to any form of… violence, through media, through video games or through films, then you put these kids at risk of expressing violence with their own acts because they’re going to imitate that.”

What kids need is more GOOD examples.

We get tired. The house is a mess. The pressure is great to finish our ‘to do’ lists. But our kids will only be teachable for a little while, and they are learning from YOU things that are more ‘caught than taught’.   Dr. Iacoboni said, ”The way we understand other people’s feelings is by simulating in our brain the same activity we have when we experience those emotions.”

So why not let them help with the chores? Turn off the TV and involve them with the day to day boring things that you want to ‘get over with’. Let them ‘mirror’ what YOU are doing. It’ll be more fun if you work together. They’ll learn to sacrifice, too! A little bit won’t hurt them. Really. And their fun will be so much better when they are done. They’ll be proud of themselves, too.

That’s why I made all my Behavior Charts and put them on GoMommyGo for Free. So you can reinforce the kinds of behaviors you want your children to do.

I know you care about educating children for good character. And if you ARE a parent, I know you must be pretty busy, so thank goodness you took a moment to read this!

Here are some links you can use to help you find things fast on GoMommyGo:

1- You can get my free Behavior charts on GoMommyGO here: http://www.gomommygo.com/thankdontspank.html

2- When you click on any image on THIS PAGE it takes you to what the images mean.

3- So many parents struggle to know how to discipline their kids.  Here are some tips for PLANNING AHEAD! And what to do when you DO need to give them consequences for bad behavior, HERE.

Many thanks for reading, and caring about the future adults around you!

Ruth Elliott
Director, Edu Designs
ruth@edudesigns.org
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Got Courteous Kids? See me on TV to learn more!

December 28, 2010

Guess WHAT?
I was interviewed by Father Manning – beloved by many for his insightful views on living in truth and love!
You’ll want to check out what made me such a kid fanatic and why I am the way I am!

Watch a portion of the interview with Ruth Elliot by clicking on the image below:


COURTEOUS KIDS December 29, 2010
Courteous Kids Banner

(Here is an excerpt, below,  from an email sent to me by Wordnet Productions, where Father Manning mentions the show!)COURTEOUS KIDS
One of the precious realities of our world are the children. They bring new life and joy. Sometimes they don’t act the way we think they should. One person said “If you want to train teenagers, do it when they are three years old.”Today’s guest, Ruth Elliott, has much to say about helping children develop the respect, love, kindness that we expect of them.

Much depends on home training. In this interview with
Fr. Mike, Ruth tells how she has done this.
Ruth Elliott was very successful commercially in art, design, and cartoons in the Hollywood area. Upon retiring and stirred by God to use her talents, she established
Edu Designs.
Through art, she helps parents and teachers to show children how to behave. When they see a picture, it is easier to remember to do the action.


Ruth is impelled by Michah’s quote: “To do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.” That is what this talented lady is doing, using her talents in the way that she feels God is asking her.

(for the complete
interview click HERE, or watch Courteous Kids on YouTube)
Cable Delivery of The Word in the World series “The Power of Love” PDF Document
Father Manning’s programs are available in over 200 thousand households around the world through delivery by broadcast, cable, satellite, and internet, as well as by direct video purchase.

The lady CHANGED 36,000 DIAPERS?

December 6, 2010

I must confess there were times in the beginning when the constant pressure of motherhood (and the smell!) could have gotten me down. But looking into the fragile and impressionable little faces before me reminded me that their emotional security was more important than my momentary inconvenience. There were only a finite number of diaper changes I would perform until this little one wouldn’t need them any more! From that moment on I embraced every opportunity to relate to them with smiles, coos, laughter and assurance that this precious little baby not only came first, but was an important person worthy of my time and attention. One day the phrase came out of my mouth, “Changing Diapers are Mommy and Baby’s chance to say “Hi!” to one another!”

The idea hit me – what a great thing to remind mom’s of, to help them forget the toll and remember the goal.  Since that time I found Cafe Press  – who will print up designs on a T-shirt for you, and at a reasonable price! I ordered them and they came within a few days!

Now YOU can get one TOO!

If you know a new mom or dad, this is your chance to get one for their little one! Seeing it just might be the reminder they need of the wonderful opportunity they have to nurture and enjoy them while they can!

Here’s where you get them: GoMommyGo’s CAFE PRESS store!

ABOUT the AUTHOR and ILLUSTRATOR:Her 7 kids are grown (and yes, she’s changed over 36,000 diapers in her time!) As a director of the non profit charity Edu Designs, Ruth now donates her time giving FREE art presentations to schools and enjoys sharing ideas to help busy parents with the challenges of raising their kids to be productive and positive people! An Emmy Award winning animation artist, author and illustrator, she offers parents tools for positive behavior in kids through her site GoMommyGo.com.

ChoresBehaviorChartsPotty-trainingAbuseDisciplineDrugs Contact

Hello World! This is my brand new blog!

March 14, 2010

Hello Everybody! Thanks for visiting Gomommygo’s blog! If you are a parent, your ideas are important. No one knows it all. Every parent learns something from their experience that can help other struggling mom’s and dad’s . Here’s your chance to share AND to learn.

I created my website GOMOMMYGO in 2003 (visit at: http://www.gomommygo.com/ ) to help parents with the challenges of child rearing. There you will find my free behavior charts, and tips gleaned from raising seven children of my own, plus links to other sites that offer professional advice.  I know you care about kids or you wouldn’t be visiting! Make sure to bookmark my site, and this blog. I’ll look forward to hearing from YOU next time!

Ruth